Secret Letter From Castro to Florida Delegation

Dear Mr. Mel Martinez & friends,

I want to extend my most sincere thanks for giving me the entire Outer Continental Shelf near Florida/Cuba to drill for natural gas and oil. Also, great job on condemning Congressman John Peterson (R-PA) for his sponsoring of a new bill that would allow the U.S. take some of my black gold. After all, I much prefer my rigs off the U.S. coast than more efficient American rigs. Plus, I don't have to think much about regulations - in case you forgot, I made them myself. :-)

While you and your Greenpeace friends are basking in the sun rather than driving your SUVs, we Cubans will be taking the oil for ourselves. Hugo was right - once a country has oil, it can make you dumb Americans do anything it wants. (Need I cite examples...Iran, Saudi Arabia, Mexico, Venezuela...).

Anyway, keep up the good work and don't worry about an energy policy. Like I say about food and healthcare for my citizens, who needs it?

Your mejor amigo,
Fidel

PS - Elian says hello to Janet Reno.


[Note: while I believe this letter is accurate, I can't confirm its authenticity.]